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It was, for those who knew his story, a remarkable statement, weighted with loss, pain and even a certain joy for Babb, a devout Mormon, that Heather’s life was lived in what she would have considered a full and fruitful faith. . .
The Heather that Babb spoke of was his 42-year-old wife, who died Dec. 6, days after delivering the couple’s eighth child. And her “understanding and position,” as Babb phrased it, virtually ensured her death.
She was killed by a cancer she apparently knew was ravaging her body, but which she’d kept a secret from everyone, her doctors and husband included. She died nine days after delivering a son, Jesse Carter Babb, in an emergency Caesarian operation during which surgeons discovered her cancer. . .
She died because, as far as anyone, including Greg Babb, can tell, she was determined to avoid an abortion or risk harming through cancer treatments the child she was carrying. . .
Driving that aim, he said, would have been her belief, girded in Mormon doctrine, that it was fulfilling her compact with her God to bring a life into the “temporal” world, which Mormons believe is a spiritual way station where people are tested to determine their worthiness before they are allowed, in death, to “graduate to the level of celestial kingdom.”
A spokesman for the church said the correctness of Heather Babb’s decision to withhold her fears about her illness could not be measured against church doctrine.
“There’s no way the faith could quantify or evaluate her decision,” said Salt Lake City-based spokesman Coke Newell.
“She clearly did the best she could, she must have gone deep into her soul and heart and mind,” he said.
There was another factor in his wife’s decision to keep her illness secret, Babb believes.
Mormon doctrine considers abortion a sin, punishable, in some cases, by removal from the church. But it permits abortion in cases where the life of the mother is at risk.
Heather Babb knew that, her husband said. If she had chosen an abortion in order to pursue cancer treatment, he said, “I would have supported her in that, one-thousand percent.”
Here is one example where abortion would be defensible and yet pro-abortion activists would have you believe this situation is the norm rather than a tiny fraction of when abortion is actually used. The Church clearly would have counseled that an abortion could have been acceptable in this situation. It seems difficult to second guess the mother’s choice but I can’t help but feel for the father and the eight surviving children. And who knows what the chances might have been that both mother and child may have survived? Ultimately though, she made an incredible sacrifice.
Matt Evans has a good post on Roe v. Wade at Times and Seasons with a link to a touching article by George Will on his son wih Down’s Syndrome.
5 comments
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24 January 2004 at 9:36 am
meg
That’s amazing. What a mom.
27 January 2004 at 10:01 am
mog
She did take a big risk thou that she would even live long enough to deliver. And it will be terribly hard for the father to raise all of them along. There are instances where abortion is necessary for example ectopic pregnancy being one where if the pregnancy isn’t terminated, both mom and baby die. I understand that however…
It does remind me when I was pregnant, I was offered amniocentesis to see if my child would have any defects. The procedure had the risk of terminating the pregnancy and I refused. I was determined to have her irregardless if whether or not she had any defects. My desire to have her was stronger than anyone could imagine so I understand her desire to fulfil her measure of creation irregardless of the cost. I would have done the same.
28 January 2004 at 3:37 am
dbrian
It is honorable that this mother sacrificed her life for the life of her child.
That said, and at the risk of sounded callous, this is just STUPID. If you have cancer, you go to the doctor, and you find out what your options are. The eight kids could still have their mother, and the dad could still have his wife, but don’t because she probably believed that abortion was a sin in any circumstance. Well, it isn’t.
The original article says that anti-abortion activists considered the story a good case for their cause. Wrong. Headline: “Mother Kills Self to Protect Embryo Inside of Her; Didn’t Think to Talk to Doctor”. Sounds like an Onion headline. Or the story of self-sacrifice when none is required. It’s ignorance. And from the sound of it, her baby was probably in more jeopardy of dying with her by not seeking medical advice.
This prompted a letter within a stake from the stake presidency to the leaders. The letter encouraged leaders to treat science as a blessing. The mormon obsession with herbal remedies and reluctance to pursue medical care is baffling.
After all you can do, people, not before.
30 January 2004 at 1:01 am
Mindi
I can’t imagine how hard this choice must have been for her, but I can’t believe she did it. We’re not the JWs for pete’s sake. My husband’s aunt died of a recurrence of breast cancer several years ago. She originally had the cancer in 1969 and it recurred in 1999. She had surgery to remove the tumors but absolutely refused the tamoxifen. Why? It was poison. Duh. She said she had seen people who took tamoxifen and they weren’t doing very well. Well, she didn’t do very well either, being dead and all… Even when the doctors offered her palliative chemotherapy she wouldn’t do it. (I can maybe see her point here, maybe…) She actually died of a blood clot because she wouldn’t take her blood thinners. But, and this is the a big but… We still receive mail from her from about 5 or 6 companies that have herbal products promising to cure everything from AIDS to diabetes. We’d take her name off their mailing list, but there’s never a return address… Anyway, I’m off track, but I just can’t imagine someone, especially someone pregnant with 7 other children, who would not do everything possible to survive. Like my husband loves to say, “Gotta wonder”.
28 July 2004 at 12:46 pm
Jean Marie Murray
I would like to inform you that you are speaking about my mother. I’m so glad that some of you can criticize her for her decision. Just to inform the writer of the artical, she knew the church’s position. She knew that she could have had an abortion and the church would have condoned it. That is why she didn’t tell my father, she was afraid of what he would want her to do.
Of the seven children I am the oldest. My mother was my best friend. I can’t tell you how many times I wake up in the middle of the night sweating because of the horrid dreams that torment me. I have felt no greater loss in my life. But I uphold her decision entirely. You people that believe in pro-choice should know better than any one - IT WAS HER CHOICE. She had the courage to choose the baby over herself.
Jesse is now eight months old. He is developing normally. My daughter is five months and they play together on the floor. Who knows how long my mother may have lived if things had been different. I certainly don’t. However she did give my brother the chance to live a lifetime. In her mind, and my own, a lifetime for him is better than a few years of suffering for herself.
As for the rest of my family there is some suffering, yet they are stronger for it. My father has a better relationship with his children. He finally respects the years of sacrafice my mother gave to raise the children. There have been lessons learned that never could have been while my mother was still alive.
I loved my mother, and I love her still. She did what she thought was right. Everyone can judge her, thats what makes each one of us unique, but it wasn’t you. You didn’t have to make the choice. I hope you never do.